* * * * * Chapter 3
Nu is a cool planet,
MIKE: (hippie) It's, like, totally radical man, It's out of sight, dude.
thought Yenne of Clan Valavan, as she walked leisurely though the trees toward the village they had landed by.
TOM: Next thing you know, Crono, Marle, and Lucca are going to show up...
The temperature was no problem for her, though. Most people thought Aravillians wore such revealing attire to attract the attention of others, but really it was to escape the heat that other planets held for Aravillians.
CROW: Aravillians, the race of sluts!
MIKE: Apparently, the Aravillians have never heard of something called "Air Conditioning".
Aravil herself was one of the coldest inhabited planets. Yenne was glad Aravillians didn't sweat like Terrans and pigs.
TOM: Whoa, huge slam on pigs out of nowhere!
Seductive beauties, hah!
MIKE: It's all plastic anyway!
Yenne wondered how many people who had actually visited Aravil still believed those tales.
CROW: (Yenna) Just because we wear no clothing and will sleep with anybody at the drop of a hat, they make up these horrible rumors!
Savoring the first actual cold breeze she had felt for years, she smiled. Things were looking up, at last. She had been sure that the End of Civilization had come, as it had come to her own people eight-hundred thousand years ago.
TOM: Wait... If they already had the End of Civilization, she wouldn't BE THERE!! Her people would be DEAD!!
The Prophets say it will happen again, and Yenne's own small talent for the Prophecy told her they were right. Strangely, Yenne had had a feeling of dread as that light had enveloped her. Any Aravillian soon learned to trust gut feelings, or pay the price.
MIKE: Her gut said that it didn't agree with Terran flesh.
Something bad would happen, and soon.
TOM: The author might write another chapter!!
"It is cold, isn't it?" her old friend Shaylor said. She had not noticed herself shiver. Nodding to him absently, she tried to think on what that feeling meant. Maybe she would have a chance to Prophecize tonight.
CROW: (Shaylor) I can do my OWN fortune-telling... I see you, me, and a bottle of cheap wine...
But even that was no guarantee that she would know. Not knowing dug at Yenne under her skin.
They had arrived at the Nu kin hall. A Nu who could speak Terran said, "We sent message Explorien, have to."
TOM: English is the language of the ENTIRE Earth, huh?
Her accent was strange.
CROW: It was almost... Canadian.
"You can fuel ten units Nu Government, have of from." Good. That should do them until they reached Ingor, the closest planet to Nu with any type of civilization, which was very far indeed. She would have to ask David to be sure. "You stay guest houses until then, can at."
MIKE: Why do the Nu sound like Yoda?
And even a place for them to stay, too. This was all very good. But why was that feeling of dread still in Yenne, flowing through her veins like a deadly poison.
TOM: So KILL HER ALREADY!!
MIKE: I don't think the author meant that literally.
The Nu live on a very large planet, but their population was barely five million. The kin hall- kin means "welcome"- was filled with Nu from the immediate area. Yenne could barely tell one from another.
TOM: Wait... those were three seperate thoughts.
CROW: Apparently the author can't grasp the concept of "paragraph".
She was aware of a conversation Anto Klarisen, the cadet she'd pulled at the last moment, was having with a Nu. The rubbery blue alien was flapping its arms, the Nu sign for ‘No', if she remembered correctly, as Anto argued heatedly with it. Finally the creature stalked off, still flapping its arms.
As Anto rejoined the group, she tugged on his sleeve. "What was that all about?"
TOM: (Anto) *Sniff* That Nu broke m-my heart...
"That Nu. Apparently he was pulling some sort of joke. Shaylor did warn us of their bizarre sense of humor."
MIKE: (Anto) Then the Nu gave me a wedie and nailed me with a cream pie.
Yenne felt the feeling of dread slowly settle into her bones, like a skim of slime in her marrow.
CROW: Ackkk! Is the author TRYING to make us sick?!
"What did she say?" Yenne asked Anto urgently.
"He. It was a he.
TOM: How does he know that?.... Nevermind, I DO NOT want to know...
I made a comment about how it might be the year 2229 by the time we get home. She said that if we expect to travel that fast we were in for disappointment. A very strange people, these Nu." Yenne was ready to agree. But why did that foreboding feeling increase with every syllable out of Anto's mouth? She had to make herself speak. "Of course. It must be Nu humor."
TOM: (sarcastic) Yeah, It was REALLY funny!! Ha ha ha ha ha ha!
It was the year 2227 right now, and at best the voyage home would take two years. That was, unless they encountered a faster ship. But wait. As she had thought theses things, the feeling crested. On a whim, she asked her P.S.E unit 2.0 the time.
TOM: (computer) (flatly) Time to get a watch. Ha. Ha. Ha.
"September 19, 2230, earth date. Endohs Ohlan, 2230, Velex time..." it said.
"P.S.E, stop." Yenne cut off the spiel of dates in a ragged voice. Their ‘instant voyage' had taken three whole years??
CROW: We've been reading this for three years?!
TOM: And we've got two more to go?!
David Morrison had a lot on his mind.
MIKE: (David) The chess club is coming up, should I go for team captain...?
CROW: (David) I really want to ask Anto to the dance, but I get so nervous....
TOM: (David) Those jocks at school are really nice, letting me do their homework for them... I just wish they'd stop shoving me in my locker....
The fact that Nu was a very cold planet did not help matters much, either. The borkalyborg, or underground house, where they were staying had no heating at all. He kept trying to think of why, but as soon as he could start any sort of theory, his shivers distracted him enough to make him forget what he had been thinking. What was it again? Or, yes, why.
TOM: (David) Why do girls run in horror when I ask them out?
Why would an Explorien try to kill them?
CROW: I think a better question would be 'who DOESN'T want to kill David?'
How were they here, three years later but without memories? It was so cold. What was he doing?!
TOM: I've got no time for this! I've got to get my pants back on!!
He had to think!! David relished the thought of returning to see Explorien Dantu put on trial for five counts of attempted murder.
MIKE: Hey guys, this story DOES have a character we like! Explorien Dantu!
TOM: If only brave, noble Dantu had suceeded....
That was if he could keep himself from choking the Krigoni Explorien first.
He had to keep reminding himself that three whole years had past since that incidence, in what had seemed a few nightmarish hours. Even so, it would be another two years before they reached Explorien-controlled space! Unless they got a faster ship, that is.
CROW: Yeah, we KNOW THAT!! And do you want to know HOW we know that?! Because you've told us A MILLION TIMES!!
Teeth chattering, he began to reflect on how cold he was. No! He would not do this! Maybe a hot drink would help. He wondered if Nu had any decent coffee.
MIKE: Hundreds of years in the future, everyone still drinks coffee!
TOM: Marvel at advanced Explorien technology!! ....Coffee! And... um,... Coffee!
Swinging out of the bed Nu kept for visiting Terrans, David put his feet on the stone floor. All thought of why and strangling Dantu flew from his head as his feet touched that stone surface. "AAAAHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!! Cold!!!!! Cold!!!! Ah! Ah! Ah! Ah! AAAAAHHHHH!"
CROW: Call me crazy, but I think the author is implying the florr is alittle chilly.
The floor was like ice to his bare feet! Dancing around on one foot, then the other, he searched for some socks. Jumping onto the bed, he pulled on Yenne's slippers, which had been left in the hall. How the Aravillian woman could stand the temperature so easily was beyond David.
TOM: Most things were beyond David, like wearing socks to bed on a freezing cold planet.
As he squeezed them on, he examined his feet. Surely they were frostbitten. After a few close looks he grudgingly decided that they were not, after all.
MIKE: Is David a doctor all of a sudden?
When finally had them on, he noticed Bantu Basha, the tall, pale blue Krigoni who had been... exiled... with them, standing at his door.
CROW: How many times are you going to describe the characters?! We got it the first time already!!
David envied his calmness, so much so that he wanted to tear out his hair.
TOM: This author's got a thing for tearing out hair.
The Krigoni people followed a strange honor system that ruled social interaction; when Bantu was with a close friend, he could trust the icy mask would be let down to show whatever little emotion he possessed.
CROW: So basically, Krigoni are cheap Vulcan ripoffs.
TOM: How many copyright voliations are in this thing anyway?
"You are a rash young man, David Morrison. Try not to yell so." David wanted to scream, Bantu's voice was so flatly monotonous.
"Uh, just on my way to... check on the repairs. Yeah, that's it." He was not about to admit to giving himself frostbite just to get a warm drink to this, this... fish!
MIKE: (David) Listen Flipper, outta my way or I'm gunna have fish-sticks tonight, Krigoni style.
‘Ah, yes. Yenne is a marvel with machinery." David made a noise that could be taken for agreement.
MIKE: (burps loudly)
He walked quickly past Bantu and up into the streets of the Hamelie, Nu for ‘village'. The three moons, like pale softly glowing balls suspended in the sky, gave some light. It was as quiet as a tomb in the village. He did not notice Bantu walking by his side until he was past the last ormquale, the above ground entrances into Nu's subterranean buildings.
"We landed in this direction." Bantu announced placidly. David had to hold his hands at his side. If not, they would be waving in the air. Could nothing break that Krigoni calm?
CROW: Could nothing stop these Vulcan wanna-be's?
* * * * * * * * * * * * The Nu merchant that had come to refuel and resupply StarRunner was a stubborn creature, one set on shortchanging Yenne an entire unit of fuel. But Yenne had bargained him back up again.
CROW: I think It's painfully clear what the sluty Aravillian DID to bargain him back up.
She was rather proud of that feat; among alien races, only Jagonners were considered better traders then Aravillians, and the reputation was earned.
StarRunner was a good name for the Saucer Ship that had been their refuge from Dantu's attempted murder of them.
MIKE: Because It ran... from... uh, stars I guess....
She'd based the name on an old legend of her people, about a giant that had run among the stars. He was good, and he helped lost travelers find their way home once more. Yenne hoped it was a lucky name, as Aravillians set great store by omens and such.
CROW: Y'know, Aravillains just sound really stupid. In fact, all of these aliensa re stupid!
TOM: Where's Dantu when you need him?
Yenne sat for a moment and let her tired thoughts drift.
TOM: ENOUGH REFLECTING!! GET ON WITH THE DAMN STORY!! (head starts smoking)
MIKE: Hey, Servo, calm down! Here, take your pills!
TOM: Mmmmm! Bacon does wonders for me!
Almost two hours ago, David and Bantu had appeared, asking her about how the repairs were coming along. David had seemed distracted. She hoped that the Terran wouldn't cause any trouble.
CROW: (Yenne) Because Terrans are stupid, flithy, sweaty pigs that grovel in dirt and desease.
TOM: (Yenne) And they actually wear clothing! Can you believe that?
They five would be together for a while, as Yenne saw it, and they had better get along. Sighing, Yenne set back to work.
MIKE: (Yenne) Might as well get on with it, I know I'm going to sleep with all of them anyway...
Idle thoughts never accomplished anything, while hard work would get you anything, with time.
Right now Yenne was kneeling in the vegetation, wet with sprinkled dew, by StarRunner, rewiring the Navigation Matrix. Replacing the metal paneling wearily, she said, "P.S.E, time."
TOM: (computer) (flatly) Time to get a watch. Ha. Ha. Ha.
"Standard time, 3.5 hours. Earth time, 3:30 A.M. Velex ti-"
"P.S.E, stop." She cut off the happy recital of times just as tiredly as she had initiated it. It was far too late to be out doing repairs, but she supposed any hours saved were for the good. Slowly she got to her feet, brushing damp leaves off her wrinkled uniform. Suddenly the Prophecy had her in its iron grip.
Dantu flung his blue hand towards her. From it a jet black bird flew straight for her eyes. Screaming in pain, she clutched her head. Her hands came away bright red. Inside of her head Dantu laughed at her, then a person covered in shadows laughed at him, then a Metaijjer laughed at both of them, seemed surprised for second, then seemed to know and control her, to be her.
TOM: Um,... AHHHHHH!! I think is supposed to be scary, anyways...
A single black feather fluttered slowly to a stony ground wet with blood, as other images flashed unseen. As it touched the ground, the vision shattered like glass, each shard slicing her mind.
CROW: What the hell was that, some kind of drugged out hallucination?
Gasping like a fish, Yenne recoiled in shock.
TOM: I think this author has something against fish.
The Prophecy had never forced itself on an Aravillian!
MIKE: The Prophecy sexually harassed me, and I'm not going to take it!
Always it had to be searched out, hunted. Always! It must be important, a foretelling of an event to rock the Universe.
CROW: The ENTIRE universe, huh? A bird nailing her in the eye is going to change the whole universe?
She felt weak, drained of... everything. Suddenly she noticed a hand, pale in the moonlight, reaching out to her. Shaylor.
CROW: (Yenne) ....Get laid. It's been a whole hour....
I need to stand. I am needing to..." she fought to rise. For some reason Shaylor looked grim.
TOM: Shoot her! Put her out of her misery!!
"Later. You can tell us later." He looked concerned, as well. The arm Yenne was using to push herself up shook involuntarily, and her elbow joint snapped shut. She collapsed once again. Then the world went black.
MIKE: And the galaxy collapsed, killing them all, The End.
Oh, the suspense....
CROW: ....Is somewhat lacking and hollow.
OK, go sign my guestbook I'm too lazy to write that big link so this is on for the main page. I really hope you liked it...
ALL: IT SUCKS!!
bear in mind that I'm 15 and have a lot of growing as a writter to do!
TOM: So go smoke pot and rob a liqour store, just leave us alone!
MIKE: Okay, let's get out of here.
(Mike and the 'bots leave)